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| # | Title | Length |
|---|---|---|
| CD 1 | ||
| 1 | Have a Wank | 1:54 |
| 2 | Perverts on the Internet | 2:34 |
| 3 | Gentleman's Wash | 2:08 |
| 4 | Chips or Tits | 2:13 |
| 5 | Wank Fantasy | 2:50 |
| 6 | That's My Erection | 2:43 |
| 7 | Men With Beards (What Are They Hiding?) | 2:16 |
| 8 | Let's Send Nan to Dignitas | 2:17 |
| 9 | Carol Vorderman | 1:56 |
| 10 | Fred and Rose | 2:22 |
| 11 | For a Million Pounds | 4:09 |
| 12 | I Was Pissed Out of My Head | 3:08 |
| 13 | Michael Jackson Tribute | 2:08 |
| 14 | I'm Gonna Lick You Out | 1:33 |
| 15 | Use My Arsehole as a Cunt | 2:35 |
| 16 | Wanking Over a Pornographic Polaroid of an Ex-Girlfriend Who Died | 1:56 |
| 17 | I Sucked Off a Bloke | 2:53 |
| 18 | Shaven Haven | 2:23 |
| 19 | Fucksticks | 2:41 |